Monday, May 26, 2008

Marriage, My Point of View

As I read the News, the BLOGS and the articles around the California Supreme Court decision I can only wonder, "What does it really mean." Yes, it means that I can now get married and enjoy the same rights and protections that opposite sex couples can enjoy. Yes, it means that I now have equal protection under the law. What it also means is that I have to fight the people that have some moral objection. I have to fight these people that want to write discrimination into the constitution. These people who spew hate and discrimination, while hiding behind their bible and their religion.

One of the things that bothers me is that in two separate legislative sessions in California they approved a bill allowing same sex marriage. Both times the Governor vetoed this bill based on the people in California's vote to define marriage between a man and a woman (this is the law that the Supreme Court overturned). My (straight) friend Jeremy made a comment that resonated with me, "if the voters of California voted that slavery was OK, does that mean that it's OK?" I will now be faced with the ballot initiative to change the Constitution. To add discrimination into the constitution for this great state. Just because 26 other states have done this doesn't make it right, and the state of California doesn't need to follow suit. Doesn't the bible teach to love thy neighbor as you would love yourself? Doesn't God tell us to "Judge not, lest ye be judged."? He doesn't mean to pick and choose your judgment, he means if you judge someone, then you will be judged by him (God).

I read on one of the religious websites backing this amendment that allowing me to marry the person that I love will open the door to two men and one woman, a man and his cow and I could go on. This is ridiculous. I am not asking to marry three men, an animal or any combination. I are two consenting adults who love each other and want the same rights and protections afforded to everyone else in this Country. Just because you may not understand the love that I share, accept the fact that I love. Accept the fact that I have been in a committed monogamous relationship for more then fifteen years. What I don't understand is that the people that spout the sanctity of marriage are the ones that are on wife number 3 or 4. These are the ones that have mistresses and sometimes even another man on the side (Google Ted Haggard). These are the things that the bible refers to, these are the things that destroy the sanctity of marriage. I can name several same sex couples that have been together a lot longer then some of the opposite sex couples, and vice versa. The point is that I am no different. I have the same love and the same fears. I just happen to be two men, or two women.

I applaud the California Supreme Court for seeing that it's my right under equal protection of the law to marry, and enjoy the benefits and protections that affords. I now take my views to you, my friends, my family. People I have known all of my life or just a short time, so that you can understand that my relationship doesn't harm anyone (I know that you know this, but it's worth stating here). The simple fact is that I fell in love with someone who happens to be of the same sex is inconsequential. I don't harm people because of my relationship, in fact I like to believe that I have made a positive difference in the lives of those I come in contact with. I enjoy quiet evenings at home, spending time with friends and family. I hike, I go to the beach and I travel. All I want now is to get married and continue to enjoy the life I have built together. All I want is to share the love that I have with the people I love. This isn't about my bedroom. This isn't about how I choose to live. This is about removing discrimination, not adding it to the constitution.

If and when the time comes and you live in or know someone that lives in California tell them to vote NO. Tell them that it's time for the State of California to show the rest of the Country that I don't hate. That I won’t give in to discrimination. If I can all show the people in our lives that what I and so many others have should be celebrated.

Thanks for being a part of my life past or present. In one way or another you have touched my life, and I hope that you can share this with those in your life who may not know anyone that is gay or lesbian.


Jeffrey said...

I am incredibly blessed to share my life with someone as wonderful as Rick, and I am pleased that he is so open and passionate about sharing his thoughts and opinions; however, that does not mean that I necessarily agree with them. Rick has used the word "we" at times when he might have more correctly chosen "I". Personally, I prefer to remain somewhat more guarded about my thoughts and opinions than Rick and I do not desire to have anyone else speak for me in these matters. I want to make sure our friends and family understand that the tone of Rick's blog expresses his feelings and opinions, not ours. Although I LOVE him dearly, we are not entirely of a like mind...

Pretty close though!

Robb said...

I keep thinking I'm gonna write something along these lines, but just can't get motivated. Too many night shifts! Anyway, I think it is pretty awesome what is going on in your state. If I still lived there I'd probably be more passionate about it.

But I'm still waiting for an announcement. ::grin::